One of the most exciting but scariest parts of Santa tech for Stu was Sleigh Drivers Ed. All the frightening stories and gory movies about speeding, accidents and drinking and driving really freaked him out.
Here is a song about a story circulating about a Santa.
Santa Got a DWI
LYRICS - Santa Got a DWI
by Sherwin Linton
Santa won't be back next Christmas Eve
It sounds strange I know, it's hard to believe
But the State Patrol's watchin' everybody these days
He was weavin' in the sky in his reindeer's sleigh
So they radioed to every cop in the state
That it was only a matter of minutes to wait
When he landed on a housetop, there they were
Tellin' Santa to exhale in a breath-a-lizer
But Santa refused to take the breath-a-lizer test
"In that case buddy..., you're under arrest...!"
They frisked him where he landed on that little housetop
Found a miniature bottle of Peppermint Schnapps
Chorus:
Santa got a DWI
For weaving around in the sky
Believe me, I wouldn't lie
Oh..., Santa got a DWI
They took Santa down to the County Jail
Gave him one phone call to raise ten-thousand bail
By some strange note - Santa called me
Said he needed ten-grand just to set himself free
I told him I'd get on it and do what I could do
But I can't make anyone believe my story is true
Just tryin' to help Santa; I don't mean no harm
Now they're tryin' to put me in the funny farm
They impounded Santa's sleigh and his reindeer too
And they'll probably end up in the City Zoo
And there won't be any Santa next Christmas Eve
I can't raise his bail..., no one will believe
Repeat Chorus -
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